Most nights of the week my wife and I spend at least a few minutes chatting about how our days were. My day’s summary may take 20+ minutes. Her daily summary maybe 1 minute or less. It’s not because she had less going on in her day, normally she has more. The difference is in how we process. I’m more of an extrovert. I tend to process things out loud. She is more of an introvert. She processes internally.
Introverts and extroverts are very different. There is no right and wrong, it’s just different. Because my wife processes internally she is a far better writer than I am. Since I process out loud, I’m much more comfortable with public speaking. This introvert and extrovert dynamic can be a challenge at times, but we’ve come to recognize and try to live in the tension and appreciate the beauty of each. One thing we have both realized is we need to speak out loud to our kids and why we love them, regardless of how we process best.
A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver.
Proverbs 25:11
To love our kids well, we must speak words. That means for me, I have to dial it back and ensure my words are fitly spoken. For my wife, that means she has to speak the words she thinks and writes. Kristin Couch has an excellent reminder of this reality for our kids. They need us to “Say the Quiet Things, Out Loud“. My wife and I talk about the positive things we see in each of our kids often, but do we say them out loud to our kids enough? That is one thing I am working on.
I hope the article is an encouragement to you. If you’re an introvert, we need to hear (not just read) from you more often. If you’re an extrovert, we need to hear a well-processed thought a bit more. Either way, we need you. But more importantly, the people closest to you (kids, siblings, friends, etc.) need to hear you say the quiet things, out loud. Who is someone you can build up today by saying something positive to them out loud? What will you say to them? When?
As always be with the Lord’s people on the Lord’s Day.
Until Next Time,
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